A Therapist’s Guide to Preparing for Birth

Preparing for birth involves so much more than packing a hospital bag and printing a birth plan. There is preparation to be done in both the body and the mind. And while nothing can fully prepare you for the transformation ahead, taking time to prepare emotionally can help you feel more empowered as you enter this new chapter.

As a therapist (and now a doula… a doul-apist, if you will), I work with expecting parents who want to feel prepared not just for the physical experience of birth, but for the emotional one, too. Here’s my guide to centering your mental health as you prepare to welcome your baby.

1. Take a childbirth class

Yes, even if you’ve done this before! Whether you’re a first-time parent or this is your second, third, or fifth baby, a childbirth class can help you understand all your options and make informed decisions about your care. Most hospitals and birthing centers offer free prenatal classes on coping with labor, postpartum recovery, newborn care, breastfeeding, infant CPR, and more.

Doul-apist tip: While hospital-based classes can be a helpful way to learn about policies and what to expect, I recommend pairing them with an independent childbirth class. These typically offer a more in-depth focus on advocating for yourself, learning coping techniques, and navigating the emotional experience of birth. Birthmark and Nola Nesting both offer independent, doula-led childbirth classes in New Orleans.

2. Read a book (or two)

Knowledge is power, and books are a wonderful way to feel more informed and prepared. Here are a few of my favorites. I especially love these because they pay extra attention to mental health and mindfulness.

• Transformed by Birth: Cultivating Openness, Resilience, and Strength for the Life-Changing Journey from Pregnancy to Parenthood, by Britta Bushnell

• Nurture: A Modern Guide to Pregnancy, Birth, Early Motherhood & Trusting Yourself and Your Body, by Erica Chidi

• Birthing from Within: An Extra-Ordinary Guide to Childbirth Preparation, by Pam England

• Why Did No One Tell Me This?: The Doula’s (Honest) Guide for Expectant Parents, by Natalia Hailes & Ash Spivak

Doul-apist tip: Most of these books (and many more!) are available at the New Orleans and Jefferson Parish public libraries. Check them out in print, or as ebooks or audiobooks through the Libby app. And fun fact- our libraries have a reciprocal agreement! If you live in Orleans, you can get a Jefferson Parish library card, and vice-versa.

A bonus tip: Keep a notebook next to your bed, or keep a running list in your phone’s notes app. As you read, jot down questions or ideas you want to bring to your birth team.

3. Plan ahead for postpartum

Birth is only the beginning. It’s essential to think about weeks that come after- and to have these conversations before you're exhausted and in the middle of a huge transition. Round up your household members + support squad and discuss the following:

• What will be our boundaries for visitors?

• What does “help” actually look like? (Household help, meals, advice, or a listening ear?)

• How can we incorporate self-care practices we enjoy?

• What happens if one of us is struggling emotionally?

• How do we usually cope with stress or overwhelm? Will this look different postpartum?

• How will we split up overnight responsibilities?

Bonus: Postpartum Support International (PSI) offers a FREE virtual Postpartum Planning for Mental & Emotional Wellbeing class. This class is held multiple times each month.

4. Join an online support group

Community matters- especially during times of major transition. Online groups can help you connect with others in the same boat, whether your pregnancy experience has been smooth sailing or you’re navigating challenges.

There is truly a group for everyone! Here are a few of my favorites:

• Postpartum Support International has over 50 virtual support groups focused on perinatal mental health. Topics include mood support, pregnancy after loss, Black Moms Connect, and more.

• JustBirth Space offers inclusive, doula-led groups for pregnancy, postpartum, and infant feeding.

• Pregnant Together is an online community for queer, trans, and solo parents and parents-to-be. They’re my first recommendation for LGBTQ+ folks wanting to connect with community!

5. Keep mental health resources easy to access

If you haven’t heard my favorite catch phrase yet, listen up: It’s important to know where to find help before you need it. If you’re not already working with a perinatal therapist, consider establishing care with one. Even if you’ve been feeling well, therapy can help you understand your risk for perinatal mood + anxiety disorders and implement practices to protect your mental health.

Pro tip from a doul-apist: Make a quick list of mental health resources, and put it somewhere you and your household members will see it often (like the fridge or bathroom mirror). Hopefully it won’t be needed- but in case it is, you and your support people will know where to turn for help.

Here are a few key resources:  

• The National Maternal Mental Health Hotline is available 24/7 at 1-833-TLC-MAMA (1-833-852-6262).

• The National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is available 24/7 by dialing 988.

• Know the crisis services in your area. These might include mobile crisis teams, walk-in centers, and other community-based supports. Connect with resources statewide through the Louisiana Crisis Hub at 855-242-2735.

Putting it All Together

Preparing mentally and physically for birth is an act of self-care. By taking classes, reading, planning for postpartum, and connecting with supportive communities, you’re giving yourself the tools to feel cared for during this time of transition.

Remember: You don’t have to do this alone. Support is available every step of the way.